thefarshore | the pet shaming continues

From: Chikusa Kakimoto
Date: April 5

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[Some days after the raid on the cultist compound and...]

my boyfriend is stupid

[And with that, Chikusa links a video of Ken making a very impressive leap in quick reaction to a paintball! ...which he catches with his mouth. The video stays on him for a few seconds later, with all the coughing, spitting, and rolling that goes with it.]

[One of these days a pet shaming sign is going to be put on that dog.]

[But that's not all! Because while he's pet shaming...]

my cats are also dumb

[There's another link to a different video. This one is in broad daylight, focused on one o the streets which goes through the illustrious Central District. Staying steady, the camera focuses on... a giant catfish of frankly monstrous proportions, larger than some people. Surrounding it is an absolute small army of nekomata. Those that are directly in contact with the fish are doing their very best to drag the fish along with their teeth, jaws locked into the flesh of the beast. Others around them seem to be slowly following along, concentrating intently. While it might be difficult to see on video, the cats are using a combined telekinetic effort to make the drag a little easier. Every now and then, the fish suddenly jerks and thrashes wildly, sending the cats scattering all over. They always come back, however, determined not to abandon their catch.]

[When they finally come near enough to the front of Temple Lie Tieguai, Chikusa's voice finally speaks up from behind the camera.]

I'm not preparing all of this...

[A dozen tiny cat voices rise up in protest, and the video cuts off.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[Ginia gestures at the flatbed cart resting some feet away.]

I have a truck waiting outside the temple to carry it the rest of the way.

[Sheer strength is also not to be underestimated.]

I see.

[Well, that sure will help in this department. Chikusa nods his head to the side.]

...I made them put it in the garden... in the shade. Because I didn't want it in the house.

[It would give Ken ideas. And the other non-talking animals ideas. And the talking animals ideas in that he might actually start preparing it.]

I'll get it out of your way then.

[She glances at the nekomata, a few still glaring daggers at her.]

And I promise to bring back some organs and fillets.

[Time to get the cart and get this catfish out of everyone's way. As she wheels the cart toward the garden, a question she should have asked earlier occurs to her.

Is the fish still alive?]

[So, the fish might still be alive.]

[As it turns out, moist enough ground in the shade is apparently just cool enough for a catfish to keep going, and apparently that's doubly true if it's some sort of giant monster catfish. Some of the nekomata have taken to still hanging around it, eyeing it warily even as it stays in place not doing anything for the moment.]

[That might change when Ginia tries to touch it.]

[Chikusa hangs back, just blinking dully at the creature.]

...They should have caught this when Hakkai was awake...

[Hakkai would be all about preparing a giant fucking fish.]

[Oh. Oh, that's a living catfish. Ginia jerks back as it lashes and wiggles on the ground. This... this is a problem.

Does she need to kill it and transport it? Transport it alive? She has a knife on her so it's not like she can't kill it and cut it.]

One moment. I need to check something.

[After her message plays, Ginia begins texting quickly. Hey, Kimi, don't mind the following text message coming in: Should I kill the catfish or bring it in alive help?]

Sure... Take your time.

[Chikusa will just sink onto the grass, allowing the many nekomata to gravitate towards him. Excuse him while he just... becomes a living cat tree, Ginia. Some of them are indeed interrogating him about what's going to happen, since they're all very invested in this fish, but the others just... seem content to be around and on him.]

[Chikusa doesn't fight this. He seems used to it.]

[Meanwhile, Kimi responds fairly quickly. Hey, it's from his girlfriend and involves food, it's kind of his job, right?]

Fresh is usually for the best but do you have the tools for that?

[His state as a living cat tree would be a source of harmless envy were Ginia not wrapped up in a catfish conundrum.]

Short of putting it back in the river and hauling it out myself this fish cannot get any fresher.
I borrowed a truck and a flatbed cart.
I have my knife too.

well it's better to keep it moist you know?
But hold on while I ask Kiwi something! ( ु⁎ᴗ_ᴗ⁎)ु.｡oO

[Fortunately, with the system that the temple has set up, it doesn't take long for him to get back with another answer.]

He says that if you don't have a tub to put it in, it should survive long enough in a drive back! (｡•̀ᴗ-)✧

[The catfish doesn't need a tub, it needs its own swimming pool. Okay. This is workable.]

Thanks!
Get the kitchen ready for catfish. (๑•̀ㅂ•́)و✧

[Ginia eyes the settled catfish again and then to the prone shinki cat tree, addressing him and the gathered nekomata through her phone.]

I'll get the fish transported. Are any of the nekomata willing to help?

[Oh, they're getting back to this. Chikusa blinks out of how he'd been spacing out, and looks to the various cats.]

...If you help her, she'll bring back fish for everyone.

[Well, that sure gets their attention, and the cats on him shamelessly leap off to gather more curiously near Ginia. "Of what particular assistance do you require?"]

[Bribery is the best motivator. With her 'cat-tive' audience, Ginia addresses them with her next message.]

I can do all the heavy lifting, but can you help keep it steady?

[She's figured the cats have some kind of telekinesis or similar ability. Don't think she didn't notice her laces trying to unravel.]

[The nekomata pretend to make a big deal of deciding, but the way their ears are all perked up probably gives it away before one of them says, "We find this agreement suitable."]

[Chikusa, in the meanwhile, just sets himself up nearby and points his phone at them. Time to film more nonsense.]

[You have fun filming the nonsense because it sure is a whole lot of it. Ginia brings the flatbed cart as close as she can before attempting to lift the catfish. Sure, she's strong. Sure, she can lift twice her own body weight or more for short periods.

A giant, wiggling catfish is still an absolute mess to deal with. Even with the help of the nekomata, Ginia still ends up half dragging, half wrestling the fish over to the cart as it wiggles and flops. It's also a little longer than the cart so the tail drags slightly, the whole mass threatening to slip off as Ginia pulls the cart back to the truck.

And then she gets to repeat it all over when she has to lift it into the back of the truck. By the end of all of this, Ginia is sweaty, her clothes are a bit slimier, and she aches all over.

Yeah. You're going to taste delicious. Ginia takes a few pictures of the monstrous catfish in the back of the truck (one picture she sends to Kiwami with the message don't tell Kimi and ruin the surprise). She bows to the nekomata and waves over at Chikusa.]

Thanks for the fish.

[See, that? That is all exactly why Chikusa didn't bother to help. All that slime, and sweat, and exhaustion... Disgusting. Mostly in the context of what he has to deal with, however. When it's another person, who doesn't live in his house, then it's hilarious. Although his amusement doesn't show on his face, Chikusa makes sure to get every moment.]

Hm. We'll be waiting.

[Seriously. The nekomata gathered around are already licking their lips and look like she can't come back soon enough.]

[It's tempting to bill the dry cleaning bill to their temple if it would do anything. As it stands, the suffering is all on herself. Ginia waves and heads back to her temple, fully ready to repeat the hassle of moving the catfish all over again. Or foisting it off onto other people. Look, she brought the fish over, others can deal with processing the monstrosity.

She's a person of her word though; early in the evening, a few large container of fish organs as well as some choice fillets and steaks are delivered to the temple of Li Tieguai. Enjoy.]

the pet shaming continues - bbs

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1/2 when you play two different characters that are relevant

2/2

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