heaven's bbs | text

[redotiertwo]

From: Davesprite
Posted: January 8th

so
its been like a week since new year
and i havent seen anyone posting about new years resolutions yet
you know
those promises you make to yourself at the start of the year that youre definitely going to hold to
and then a week later youre lying on your bed eating chips and soda again because you almost definitely promised yourself you were going to work out more and then didnt
is that not a tradition here

if it is then tell me about your resolutions that are totally going to happen
since were past the one week honeymoon period
maybe i can give you advice on how to stick to them
or if you pay me i can be your personal resolution trainer
with motivational 80s music montages and everything
for like a month since if you can't keep it yourself past then youre fucked anyway
but you can always say you tried
even if i did most of the trying for you

anyway
resolutions
go

Comments

[yasei]

Uuh, right, I'm sure it did.

[redotiertwo]

you want to know how i can tell it did
because nobody who got the point would write a wall of text like that one
unless they were trolling but if you havent seen movies before im guessing you werent

[yasei]

Maybe they just think it's stupid in general.

[redotiertwo]

even if they think its stupid
they know its a thing enough not to ask a laundry list of questions about it
they just accept that its a thing and its stupid and move on with their lives
imagine that

[yasei]

[ Obi intentionally delays his reply, as if he's given it some serious thought. In reality he moved to another rooftop in another district. ]

I keep trying to imagine it, but I just can't.

[redotiertwo]

congratulations my guy
you are doomed to overthink the simplicities of movie bullshit
forever

[yasei]

Oh no, how will I ever manage to move up in life!

[redotiertwo]

i dont know
sure sounds like youre stuck in boring plebian status
and also no fun allowed status

[yasei]

Well, I'm sure it will be terrible and that I'll never have a single minute of fun ever again.

[redotiertwo]

damn straight you wont
youre your own worst enemy of fun
the fun police that come to you in your bed
its you
you are them

[yasei]

Whatever that is you're probably right. I'll have to figure out how to save myself some other way.

[redotiertwo]

might i suggest surgery
specifically one to remove whatever's lodged up your ass

[yasei]

[ Sorry, he starts to laugh really hard and almost fell from his perch. ]

If only!

[redotiertwo]

yeah i dont think science has progressed that far yet
its a shame

[yasei]

In this world I'm sure there will one day be hope.

[redotiertwo]

maybe
until then bear that ass rending stick with pride

[yasei]

I wish I could do that, but I guess I'll have to figure something out.

[redotiertwo]

ah well
fair travels and all that shit

[yasei]

Thank you thank you very much!