Heaven's BBS | Text & Video ~ A Stolen Voice

[takenwithhim]

Posted: May 21st
From: Sousuke Yamazaki

What are shinki?

I’ve not been here long, so I don’t know the truth. Apparently no shinki can. But I’ve experienced enough.

I don’t like it.

We’re shinki. We weren’t told anything upon our arrival. All we knew is that we’re dead and know nothing else. Other shinki probably had the same experience I did: stumble around until someone told me I had to find a god or something before something bad happened to me. We have to rely on whatever our gods tell us as the truth. We’re told we’re supposed to help our gods with their duties and wants and protect them or fight for them. We can’t exist without you; gods give us form and prevent us from fading away. We have to depend on you to survive.

So what are we to you?

I have a god. A Master. He tells me that I’m human more than I’m his shinki. I don’t know if I believe him entirely.

Not all Masters are like that, are they. Some don’t care what a shinki feels. I guess that’s not far from the truth though. After all, shinki are really nothing more than tools to gods. Gods can pick us up simply because they want something from us. Maybe you feel good having us at your side because you think we remind you of something. Maybe you want us because we’re useful to you or you like our looks or fit your fighting style or powers.

But if it doesn’t work out, if we piss our gods off or don’t please them, they’re allowed to discard us like a broken item. Gods can even cycle through us one after another until they’ve found the perfect tool to fit their current needs. And when you’re done, you can throw us away until you’re ready to use us again. Or left to wander for someone else to maybe pick up before we fade away into nothing.

And we have no choice but to come when you call us whether we want to or not. Because we’re nothing without you. We’re valuable possessions to keep close or useful but expendable objects to get the job done.

I don’t know if all gods are aware of this; I know the shinki aren’t. Gods can even steal shinki from another god without asking. Force a new name upon us and give us a new form and power. And if we’re stubborn, apparently blackmail and threats are just as effective. Or you can simply hurt us until we break or get rid of us because we’re not working as you want. Like we’re some kind of toy for your amusement.

We’re told we’re entering a partnership with our gods, but in reality, it only goes one way. We have to choose between vanishing or living as a weapon, companion, prize, tool, whatever, for a god we don’t even know.

If you’re a shinki, think about this. If you’re a god, ask yourself why you have a shinki.


[A video feed flicks on. A full moon glows yellow in the sky above, encircled by spiraling clouds. The edge of a sakura tree billows pink and gentle at one side of the screen, releasing ghost-light sakura petals into the winds that carry them away. It’s silent, some for himself to gather his thoughts, some for letting whoever’s listening to him think. Maybe it is rambling, but the experience he went through…]

So what are our rights? Does anyone want to tell me how this is supposed to work?

All of this may not be something some of you gods care about.

But the shinki should know.

[His is a quiet voice, deep like the dark waters far below the surface of the sea.]

I’m aware I’m probably a rare case; most of the gods I’ve met seem decent. Some of you say you’d never act like I’ve described or think like this towards a shinki. That we can trust you. But we don’t know you. So how can we trust you? Ultimately we have to trust our gods because we don’t know anything else. Whether you use that to your advantage or not is up to you.

It’s a disgusting feeling to know you’re powerless against someone else. I can be stolen and wielded by any god who wants me, regardless of how I feel about it. And if I don’t want that, I have to eternally stick by my Master’s side like a frightened child. We’re not free; we can’t even rely on ourselves because our powers, beyond the borderline, is useless unless directed by a god. I didn’t want this, I don’t know if any shinki does.

[A quiet breath seeps backwards above the screen and the edge of a shirt sleeve flutters into view on one side of the screen. Sousuke’s leaning against the wall beside the window, not in sight, but obviously here if someone feels like talking.]

And if any of you gods haven’t yet learned how to track or trace your shinki, you should start working on that now. Otherwise you're going to find yourself out a useful tool for a while simply because some other god wants to do something different for a change.

Comments

[sonofson]

Just don't forget!

[Not that he would let him but Goten still has to say it. He knows Sousuke won't forget, or at least he really hopes he wouldn't. It's exciting to be able to train together! Just like swimming. Goten isn't really sure which one is better. They're both great!

But the mention of a possible training meeting makes the boy blink. It sounds like fun at first until Goten thinks a bit more on it. If it just didn't have that last word, 'meeting', attached to it. While the boy is still a bit young to really be know what exactly a meeting would contain, he does figure it means there will be a lot of talking or planning. So wouldn't that mean they wouldn't really get to train? That doesn't sound very fun.

Goten rocks back and forth a little as he ponders that. He isn't sure; but Sousuke would know though right?]

A training meeting...? Would we get to train or is that just talking cause I don't wanna go if it's just that.

[takenwithhim]

I won’t.

[He’s still got that swimming promise in his mind so of course he won’t forget any of the other offers and promises he’s making to the smaller shinki. Between swimming, visiting, training, and other such things, they’re making quite the list of things to do between them.

A brow arches as he watches Goten’s brain working with that new information. Did he say something wrong? He thought Goten’d be thrilled to know there was a group of shinki getting together to train. Action, meeting new people, exercising those shinki abilities that Goten’d just said he wanted to learn more about. He remains quiet, waiting for that clarifying question to come out. Thinks back to the words he’d used, but doesn’t come up with a reason. And then gets his answer.]

Oh. Not sure, but I know you’ll be training. There’ll probably be talking to let you know what to do. Since you haven’t used your shinki abilities yet.

[After all, it’s not like someone could “teach” Goten by simply walking up to him and going “make a borderline” when the kid’s never made one before, right? Amusing that he’s waffling over the aspect of “too much” talking. Sorry Goten, but life can’t always be an action movie.]

[sonofson]

[He's pretty pleased with the list growing and growing. It just means there will be more time to hang out and do stuff together which Goten is always up for. So he's not going to put a limit on those promises at all.]

As long as it's not super long talking. I wanna try it not just hear about it!

[And that grin is back in place. Simple kid with simple desires. Life can be an action movie as long as you go go go! Or at least that's what he thinks. Besides, hands on training is always the best. Who knows, maybe he'll be able to get Sousuke to show him too before then. Then they can have borderline completions and stuff.]

As long as you go to, then I bet we can make it fun. I'll learn a lot too, I promise!

[Unless something else grabs his attention. Goten can work hard but he's still a fun loving kid]

[takenwithhim]

[Honestly, they could make a list from here to the shore and back and it’d probably all get done. There’s not much else to “do” around here as far as Sousuke’s concerned. Yes, he trains and hangs out with Rin, the occasional prayer, but asides from that… what else is there?

But Sousuke’s Sousuke so he’s not going to fill up that list with promises when he knows he’s the kind of guy that’ll take a nap in the afternoon instead of watering the lawn unless he’s asked to. (Within reason, cause he’s not a lazy guy at all. Just likes to snooze every now and then.)]

You’ll have to hear before you try at first. It’s not long at all.

[He can even coach him right now over the phone if Sousuke were in the mood for it. But… despite his better spirits, he’s still not in the mood enough to go about something like that. At least Goten’s smiling again and that makes him feel better. He’s not knocking the kid’s opinion though; Sousuke’d much rather learn hands on than have someone tell him.]

Aa. I’m going to go.

[He’s not promised the organizer, but he knows he’ll be going regardless. So there. Someone gets to hear the confession at least.]