Heaven's BBS | TEXT

[chickshades]

Posted: May 8th, late afternoon
From: Bandou

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wth are you supposed to do when youre stuck in bed all day??
or for a week
or damnit idk however long it takes for your ribs to heal?

Comments

[chickshades]

hey
that asshole niles is coming over
i dont know why the fuck i said yes
but can you just keep an eye out and fuck him up if he pulls any shit

lol
i kinda wanna see you kick the shit out of him anyway!!


[ It's totally not because Niles was offering him porn... ]

[nakemen]

[So he tries to type a reply. He really does try, but this is awful? This is literally awful because his fingers hit the wrong thing and he can't type fast and THIS IS A WASTE OF TIME.

He stomps to where Bandou is and points:] WHY ARE YOU LETTING THIS ASSHOLE IN MY TEMPLE?! [Wait he shouldn't be yelling at Bandou...oops.] Uh, I'm still sorry.

[chickshades]

[ He should have expected Kane-san to come into his room instead of texting him back, but it still scares the shit out of him. The jerking upwards in surprise makes his abdomen hurt quite a bit. ]

GAH!! I DON'T KNOW... ow...fuck...

[ And he quickly lays down again. ]

[nakemen]

[Now he feels like a jerk.] Ugh, don't move. I'm sorry...again. Shit...[He's bad at this. But he is trying.

He moves over to Bandou's bed and tries to tuck him in a little better to make him comfortable.] I'll take care of you. Why is that pervert coming over?

[chickshades]

It's okay, I told you that last time.

[ It's so nice that his god appreciates him that much, and the tucking in is so odd for him to do, that it means even more.

But now he's gotta admit to why he's letting Niles near him. ]

...he said he'd bring me porn?

[nakemen]

[Izuminokami might be a sword, but he isn't an idiot. He knows what porn is and his entire face turns red.]

I. [But he is a baby sword.] Why are you letting him bring porn if you're sick of him hitting on you?! As the freakin' love goddess, I'm pretty sure this is an invitation to that!

[chickshades]

Where else am I gonna see some boobs?!

[ He's never going to irl at this rate! He just needs to begin to accept that! And your a love goddess, you should be able to get him some...cause that's how it works, right??? ]

And that's why I wanted you to watch him for me!

[nakemen]

Then why not ask me instead of him?! [He sighs and brushes his bangs out of his face for a moment, aggravated some pervert is going to be in his temple.]

I could have gotten you some. Probably. I mean, I'm a love goddess.

[chickshades]

Can you get me a girlfriend then?

[ As a 'thank you for saving me'? Not that Bandou would actually blackmail him like that. But it'd still be nice. In fact he sounds so fucking pathetic when he asks. ]

[nakemen]

I...maybe? I could try. I mean. I know how to impress girls so I could probably do that.

[This is really far from the original point.]

[chickshades]

[ Bandou looks so hopeful. ]

At least teach me how to do that. I apparently suck at it.

[ Good, don't yell at him anymore. And stay in the room until Niles gets here. Then you can kick him out with an actual kick. ]

[nakemen]

Impressing girls isn't hard! You just have to be beautiful and show how cool and strong you are.

[It's that simple!

But he'll totally stay in this room because he won't let Bandou get hurt again. Who knows what else this Niles will want to do?]

[chickshades]

I thought I was doing all of that!

[ Bandou, there's a difference between you thinking you're handsome, awesome and strong and the ladies thinking that. ]

[nakemen]

Are you sure you looked beautiful?

[That's obviously the most important part!]

[chickshades]

Yeah?

[ Except for the mess of black hair that's a combination of bed head and semi-permanent hat hair. And his black eyes that have barely seen the light of day.

Was he not? Kane-san, was he not beautiful at all?? ]

[nakemen]

[He's afraid that doesn't sound very beautiful at all. But hey, there's tricks to that. Or so he's heard. Not that he's never had to use them.]

Eh, we'll figure it out. It can't be that hard to get you a girlfriend.

[chickshades]

Don't tell me I have to grow my hair out like yours...

[ Cause he'd probably die before it got that long... oh wait. ]