Heaven's BBS | Text

[deniles]

Posted: 22 April 2016
From: Anonymous

Are you bored?

Me too. Let's have some fun.

I'd like to say I'm somewhat of a relationship expert, so I'd like to answer all your relationship problems.

Why? Boredom mostly. I'm giving you guys a gift so don't waste it.

Well. Send them in. And if you need a name, call me Relationship Guru.

[ooc: Niles will be giving intentionally bad advice because he's still an asshole at heart, so just keep that in mind!]

Comments

[probably anon]

[punchpass]

How do you get your god to like animals?

[anon]

[deniles]

Cover them in animals.

[punchpass]

I don't have enough animals.

[deniles]

That's no excuse. You just have to try harder. Maybe borrow some animals.

[punchpass]

The only person who has more than one animal is a very scary person, and I don't think they would appreciate me taking their animals.

Besides, I am not going to disturb others in my quest to get my god to appreciate my dog a little more.

[deniles]

Hmm...

Hmmm....

I'm sure there are places where you can take care of animals.

[punchpass]

Do you mean an animal shelter?

I am too invisible to adopt a puppy or a cat from a shelter.

[deniles]

Have you even tried?

[punchpass]

Not yet, though I honestly don't think anything will change from the several times I have tried to get storekeepers attention.

[deniles]

There's no reason to give up then.