Heaven's BBS

[very_goodman]

Posted: 22 April 2016
From: Barry Goodman

So, uh... having more than one god. How's that all work? Do they get joint custody, and the shinki just lives at each god's temple for a week at a time or something?

'Cause that mighta happened.

Comments

[very_goodman]

Yeah, you should give it a shot. We could use some better entertainment around this place.

[redotiertwo]

yeah nothing against the harps and bells but the angelic chorale deal afterlives are supposed to have going just doesnt really do it for me
guess i need turntables first but this is true dream material here
the corniest of college sitcoms
we gotta dream big before we remember that we dont have the money or means to actually do what we want to do and then circumstances contrive to bring it to us anyway
because the true moral is that if we complain for long enough the world bends over apparently

[very_goodman]

Two turntables and a microphone.

[Where does he know those lyrics from. He can't remember.]

Well, we ARE in heaven. Maybe prayin' hard enough really is how you get what ya want.

[redotiertwo]

yeah thats the stuff
should start looking online see if anything rings any awkward deja vu bells

well instead of praying i could maybe
ask hajime
if she knows anything about it
since she's the singular god whos kind of obliged to listen to me

[very_goodman]

Kinda the same thing as prayin', really. Except you get to go straight to the source. Anyway, good luck with it.

[redotiertwo]

dude have you met hajime
itd take a thousand broken mirrors worth of bad luck for her not to at least make the attempt

[very_goodman]

Sounds like you got yourself a pretty generous goddess there.

[redotiertwo]

ok so you havent met hajime
hajime is like
the embodiment of fucking mad energy
i dont know how she does it but nothing can stop the bounce in her step or the flying hugs or whatever else she feels like springing that day

[very_goodman]

Hey, at least she's friendly! You coulda ended up with a jackass for a god.

[redotiertwo]

yeah no way in hell am i saying i didnt get lucky as fuck there
but without exact numbers on jackass to non jackass ratio i cant say exactly how lucky

[very_goodman]

So what's she the goddess of, anyway?

[redotiertwo]

internet says hunting, weaving, wisdom and war
so you know might as well throw in the deluxe knife set and the buy one godly domain get another one free on top

[very_goodman]

Huh. Gods sure are weird. What's any of that got to do with the other stuff?

[redotiertwo]

i dunno man ancient gods were all over the fucking place sometimes
someone probably ripped up some papyrus or parchment or whatever and threw all the domains into a hat
grabbed a handful for each god like "alright lets make us the least sensical pantheon this side of the nearest populated planet"

[very_goodman]

Makes about as much sense as anything else, I guess. Kinda glad I don't gotta worry about that, to be honest.

[redotiertwo]

im feeling like im pretty used to godly domains but that might just be the nonexistent weirdometer speaking
but yeah one less thing to dedicate precious headspace to when youre already dealing with the minor detail of afterlife dimension crossing

[very_goodman]

Yeah, it's much easier just turnin' into a weapon and kickin' ayakashi butt.

[redotiertwo]

you know has anyone made like
a boring spreadsheet of who turns into what
shinki wise
i feel like thatd be a study in suspending disbelief and general hilarity ensuing

[very_goodman]

Beats me. Bet it would be pretty funny, though.

[redotiertwo]

yeah theres probably no end to the insane shenanigans of what the fuck god weapons turn into
weapons in the least literal way i can possibly say weapons

[very_goodman]

Hey, speaking of - whaddaya you turn into? You get a chance to try it out yet?

[redotiertwo]

yeah though we dont know what my whole power deal is yet
a sweet pair of turntables on gear platforms

[very_goodman]

Haven't been in a fight yet, or Hajime just doesn't know how to use 'em?

[redotiertwo]

both
proper use of turntables takes serious instruction that i could hand on
the mightiest of spinning and scratching techniques at my disposal
but im going to assume ive never spun tables with a magic twist before

[very_goodman]

Hard to say, huh? Good luck with that. All of my forms are pretty easy to use.