text | Mephistopheles

[subconmodo]

Someone please, please chime in. You agree that this isn't healthy, right? I'm not the only one, right?

Public shaming is perfectly warranted in this instance, right?!

[attached is a photo of Hat Kid. She looks confused. In one hand she holds a bottle labeled "Meatball Wine." In the other, a sign. It says "I got caught drinking marinara sauce and apparently do so 'some of the time."]

[Yes. This is basically a pet shaming picture]

Comments

Text: Angra Mainyu

[badassfreakingoverlord]

She can drink marinara sauce if she wants! Who says she can't?!

voice | from: Carl Adler

[smilingbullet]

Yeah I'm not sure about the health benefits of drinking pure marinara sauce, but why would the shaming be necessary? In the end it's her choice though isn't it?

voice | from: Obi

[yasei]

No. Let the Little Miss live her dreams, let her drink all the marinara!

[subconmodo]

Are you serious? Do you have any idea how unhealthy that is? It has to be unhealthy!

[subconmodo]

I'm shaming because she keeps arguing with me that it's normal. I know she's an alien and all, but that doesn't mean she's not screwing herself over.

If it were tomato juice I'd have a lot less questions!

[subconmodo]

What is wrong with you people?! No dream should involve that much marinara sauce!

[badassfreakingoverlord]

She's like ten! She's eating stuff made of vegetables while most kids her age are gobbling down packs of Duble-Duble-Stuffed Oreos and Captain Chocula!

[subconmodo]

If it was actual tomato juice you would have a point. It's not.

I don't even know what's in this! There's no nutritional facts or anything! Whoever makes this stuff HAS to be breaking some kind of law!

[badassfreakingoverlord]

And you're not encouraging that?! What kind of alleged menace are you? Your new name is Goody Two-Snatcher!

[subconmodo]

Since when am I a menace?!

Okay.

Fine.

I've stolen and eaten a few hundred souls in my day. But it's not like that's that big of a deal.

[and the worst thing about this is that "Goody Two-Snatcher" is a pretty good joke as far as he's concerned. But like hell is he going to admit any of that!]

[badassfreakingoverlord]

I never said you were a COMPETENT menace! But you're sure as hell not sprouting a halo any time soon.

Who died and made you the kid's legal guardian anyway?

[subconmodo]

Look, the kid and I have a mutual agreement where I try to kill her and take her soul. It's our "thing."

I can't do that if she's already dead because you people don't understand proper nutrition, can I?

[badassfreakingoverlord]

Oh, so she tricked you into being her guardian, huh? Sucker! Besides, you're underestimating her. She's a tough little brat! She can take some marinara sauce every once in a while!

[subconmodo]

I

Am

Not

Her

Guardian!

Stop putting words in my mouth, you overgrown paperweight!

[badassfreakingoverlord]

Hyaaaha ha ha ha ha! You totally are! You have to look out for her and protect her from the dangers of the world because if she dies to anything but you, you lose the deal!

[subconmodo]

[It takes him a bit longer than usual to reply to that.]

[Mostly because Snatcher has just realized that Zetta is absolutely, positively, one-hundred percent correct]

You know, maybe I have been going a little too easy on the brat lately.

[badassfreakingoverlord]

You're being a total papa bear over there. You should be in a Disney cartoon. All you need is some random wife in a nightgown who will find her porridge too cold!

...by the way, the hell is up with you trying to kill the kid?

Voice

[hattersgonnahat]

[Wha-]

[HE DID POST IT. THE KID KNEW IT. Wasn't there supposed to be a law against these things?]

There's nothing weird about it at all!

[subconmodo]

She trespassed in my forest, I offered her work in exchange for her survival (and her soul), and, annoying cockroach that she is, she managed to survive. Somehow.

I'm working on fixing that.

[we don't talk about the BFF contract]

[badassfreakingoverlord]

Hmmm. So you made a minion out of her, huh?

[Zetta is starting to get the spark of an eeeeevil idea.]

[subconmodo]

More of an intern, really.

[badassfreakingoverlord]

SHE'S YOUR EQUIVALENT OF A PRINNY?!

[subconmodo]

Hey, I let her keep whatever she found while she did my jobs! All she had to do was do some plumbing, burn a few paintings, destroy a possessed outhouse, deliver some mail...

You know, easy stuff!

[badassfreakingoverlord]

Plumbing? Mail delivery?!

[Zetta's cool with the other stuff but OH THAT'S IT]

[subconmodo]

Yes, mail delivery. My minions' motivational packages aren't going to deliver themselves!