thefarshore | fox problems

Date posted: May 10th-11th, sometime during the night
From: Inari

[A video is posted to the BBS. It starts out dim, but a lamp seems to be turned on and there they are -- foxes. A whole lot of them. They're laying on the furniture, sitting on the ground, lounging on the floor cushions. And they're everywhere; each white fox with red eyes seems to be emitting a pale, silvery glow. These were definitely the fox messengers of the god Inari and while Gintoki knew that and dealt with them before, well, he'd never seen this many at once . . . his voice comes on the video.]

What are they. . . [it's a panicked whisper now] . . . what are they doing. . . why are there so many of them and I told them to stay out of my room. . .they don't listen worth crap. . . no, wait. . . stop looking at me. . . why're they all staring at me. . .

[It's true. The foxes did seem to be staring carefully at their master, now that he's awake. He probably hadn't noticed up until now, but since Gintoki had decided he was going to get up in the night and deal with a dangerous shinki earlier in the week and had gotten himself pretty injured, more and more foxes had been showing up in his room at night. Were they trying to be helpful? Were they looking after him . . . or were they taking advantage of his weakness because they didn't want to sleep in the old barns and distillery around the temple . . . anyway, this was the first time he'd woken up at night and seen so many of them. Should a god be scared of spirits, anyway?

But the camera jerks and there's the mighty god Inari curled up under his blankets which were pulled up over his head, looking terrified. He'll close his eyes, pull the blanket a bit closer, and then he'll shout as loud as he can.]

You. . . YOU'RE ALL CREEPING ME OUT! CREEPY! CREEPY!

[ There's some really jerky, choppy footage but it looks like a pillow gets thrown at a few foxes, and there's general chaos as the foxes all try to scramble out of the room at once. There's got to be 15-20 of them.]

STAY OUT OF MY ROOM YOU GLOWING BASTARDS AND I'M NOT GONNA SAY IT AGAI--

[the feed cuts out. ]

Threaded | Flat

[Ross hadn't been listening to the video, but he had been trying to sleep. Key word being trying, as the sudden chaos from Gintoki's room was more than enough to wake a light sleeper like him. He crawled out of his futon and dug out the strange device everyone used for talking on the BBS instead of walking over there.]

what are you doing

Edited (I'm a dummy and forgot this is a bbs post) 2016-10-31 07:02 (UTC)

[Sorry, friend, but here is another fox. He seems more normal than the others--no glowing, for one thing, the only flash of red in his gold eyes coming from pupils reflecting the light of the screen in front of him, and pale fur that could be silver rather than white if the lighting were better--but then he opens his mouth and speaks in a rather deeper voice than one might expect to hear from a little fox. (Certain people may recognize the voice, the fox, or both, even without all four tails visible, and others may put two and two together, but that's something Kurama is prepared to deal with.)]

You seem to be having some difficulty communicating.

Ah, there's hope for you in love after all, Gintoki! I'm happy for you.

What just happened? Do you need someone to lure the foxes out?

[This was so weird. And that's a lot of foxes...

...does this mean she should be worried about jaguars sneaking into the temple and into her room....]

yeah ive had the same problem
ruddy shadows wont stop watching me
takes a bloke forever to get some sleep
have you tried laying down some ground rules?
seemed to work for my problem

damn
should i be opening the betting pool on how long it takes this to reach all corners of the heavenly video streaming services
putting money on the countdown to someone remixing this into an earworm of the highest order
actually scratch that ill save them the trouble and do it myself
this is too much quality content to pass up

My, my.

It looks like...

You're quite the popular man. Aren't you?

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from: anonymous (video)

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