Heaven's BBS | Text

[saikusu]

Posted: May 5, morning
From: Saïx

I can only assume this sword was left as a gift for me, as it feels like an extension of my arm when I hold it, however I have no clue why it would be gifted to me or why it's so easy to wield. Also, the shirt was an odd additional gift. If anyone has any information regarding this gift, it would be appreciated.

Unrelated, the animal shelter I have been working at is waiving the adoption fees for all adult cats and dogs on the 6th and 7th. If anyone has been considering adopting a pet, this would be a prime time to do so. I will be working both days if anyone is concerned about being overlooked by the living employees.

---------
Attachment:
giantsword.jpg [The picture shows a claymore planted in the ground in front of Odin's temple with a white t-shirt on the handle.]

Comments

[saikusu]

[There is so much he could say about the orange text and lack of punctuation, but given that he can highlight the text to make it more legible, there's little point in complaining.]

Difficult, but not impossible. Especially when you know how severe the consequences are for thinking too much about it.

I'm not certain I want to know what you mean by built in sheath, and yet I'm quite curious about it.

[redotiertwo]

yeah im gonna have to admit the general fuck this shit averseness to thinking about any of that had me flying circles the morning it turned up
one minute im half thinking about it again then i get rebounded by my own somehow still a thing self preservation instinct for like two minutes
then the cycle begins again
its like the circle of life but the circle of dead people trying not to remember shit

cant turn down an explanation if youre that curious but its not that interesting
theres a finely crafted hole in my stomach the exact dimensions to store a sword in

[saikusu]

You certainly have a colorful way of speaking, and I am not talking about the orange text or profanity.

That is definitely built in. I would ask how, but we both know the answer is that you don't know.

[redotiertwo]

i like to think its a combo plate of colorfulness in all its meanings
tied up in a unbearably awesome neon orange bow

you would be correct
now just make sure you dont switch doors next round we all know thats bullshit
im not going to say i havent asked myself the same question though

[saikusu]

If you insist.

Is it uncomfortable carrying it around like that? The weight of the sword must put some strain on the surrounding tissue.

[redotiertwo]

nah its like full sword in the stone shit right here
the one true hole in some random rock that the sword was made for until death do them part
except the hole is in me
and gravity doesnt really seem to be involved im not really sure whats going on there if im being honest
but like you said im pretty sure if gravity were a part of this relationship itd hurt more
maybe the sword gets magical antigravity bullshit powers when its stabbed into me it makes as much sense as anything else here

[saikusu]

It's good to know that you seem to be as bewildered by the physics defying antics of your built in sword sheath as I am.

Not that I have the room to speak on odd modes of sword storage. It seems I can make my sword disappear and reappear at will. I have no clue where it goes and how it stays with me no matter where I travel, but it does.

[redotiertwo]

i mean i have grounds to be less surprised when i can fucking levitate anyway
but you know physics defying sword antics are that one step over the line

like a hammerspace deal
damn thats way more convenient than the stomach stabbing
probably breaks a couple more laws than just physics but apparently the laws of the universe are for chumps when it comes to weaponry

[saikusu]

You can levitate? How did you figure that one out?

Is that the word for it? Regardless, it is quite convenient. The logistics of it elude me, but then so do the logistics of our vessel forms. However, I believe like a number of things around here, they will never explain the whys and hows behind them to us. Either for a lack of being able to explain to us shinki, or being unable to explain it at all.

[redotiertwo]

i have wings so it pretty much just involved me coming to the stunning realisation i was hovering without actually flapping any of the relevant flappy parts of my anatomy after id been doing actual flying

its definitely a word for it
but you have a point on the madness inducing rabbit hole that is vessel froms and what the legitimate fuck is going on there

[saikusu]

I see. So you have wings and a sword sheath in your torso. Anything else unusual about you that I should know before I ask another dumb question?

How do the transformations even work? Or how are our vessel forms chosen in the first place? I'm not sure which the bigger, more maddening question is there.

[redotiertwo]

okay lets see here
neon orange
ghost butt
talons and feathers
unspeakably awesome
i think that covers everything

theyre both pretty up there in terms of prime navel contemplation material
i havent even seen enough vessel forms to make a call honestly but it sure isnt our gods actually knowing how to use them because as great as hajime is i dont think shes seen a set of turntables in her life other than me