Heaven's BBS | Text

[ittenbari]

Posted: May 1
From: Sakon Shima

Look I'm writing on the thing! Oh hey it's fixing the words so they look right.

Okay so I was watching videos (they're called videos) on the thing

oh Nagisa says the thing is called a phone

So I was watching videos on the phone and there was this guy eating peppers on a bet and I could do that!

How many ghost peppers do you think I can eat? I'm already dead so it can't kill me, so how many? Leave bets here.

Does that work?

Anyway bet money and the closest guess wins it all! If I eat more than the highest guess and I don't die again, I win it all!

Leave money at Azeban's temple. This will work, right? I'm still working on it.

Comments

Action because obv Nagisa's there

[shortnsweet]

[ Nagisa's already searching where they can order these peppers from, in case they can't locate them locally. ]

Hey and if we record it and post it online, we could make even more money just from people watching it.

[ittenbari]

Really? Do you think we could do that?

[It's taking 100% of Sakon's brainpower to type responses to all the comments he's getting, so it takes a second for that to sink in.]

How do we get the money? Through the phone?

[It really is magic.]

[shortnsweet]

Yeah, being a YouTuber's a pretty big thing now. The more views and subscribers you have, the more money you get.

Sometimes companies will even send you free stuff to try out on your channel!

[ Are Nagisa and Sakon gonna be the next internet sensations? They've certainly got the extreme personalities it requires. Problem would be...could anyone even see them in their videos? Aside from other gods and shinki, that is. ]

[ittenbari]

[In all likelihood, neither one of them is going to think it through that far until after it happens.]

That's awesome! We're gonna have to get everyone to watch! This one guy says I should bury myself in ice and see what happens. I told him maybe I could do that and the pepper thing at the same time, but he didn't think it would be that great an idea. I don't know. I think I could do it.

[Sakon, no.]

[shortnsweet]

Yeah maybe try one thing at a time.

[ Suddenly his eyes light up and he turns his phone's screen towards Sakon. There's a website shown where you can buy almost any pepper imaginable. ]

They're kinda expensive for one pepper though.

[ittenbari]

Wha?! That much?!

[He clearly hasn't thought this through far enough. Probably because he hasn't really thought it through at all.]

Someone wanted me to eat fifty! We're not even gonna turn a profit on this!

[This is making his head hurt and he hasn't even started eating peppers yet. Maybe the guy who said to eat twenty pounds of hamburger was on to something...]

[shortnsweet]

Yeah, but I don't want you to hurt yourself either.

[ But damn, Sakon's right. With someone betting 50 on this, they could be out a lot of money if Sakon can't do it. And those peppers seem really hot.

Nagisa taps his chin for a moment, thinking. Then he quickly scrolls through Sakon's post, reading over everyone's comments. ]

Oh hey, I know! You never said you would eat all the peppers at once. So all you really have to do is eat one a day. Maybe two if they're not too bad.

We can close off betting so no one can alter their bets - which the highest is 50 now, right? Then you can take as long as you need and we'll win no matter what!

[ittenbari]

But that's cheating!

[Sakon looks absolutely horrified and he waves his hands frantically as if he's trying to clear the air itself of the idea.]

That's totally cheating! They'll all want their money back!

[shortnsweet]

It'd only be cheating if you said you'd eat them in one go!

[ wink wink Come on, Sakon. You're the shinki to a trickster god. Bending the rules is way different than cheating! ]

[ittenbari]

[Bear with him, Nagisa. This is a totally new experience for him, even if he can't remember why right now. His old boss in his past life probably would have threatened to kill him for even suggesting this sort of thing. Actually, he, uh, did kill him partly because he thought he was lying to him...]

Well, that's how they do it on the phone...

[He scratches his head as he thinks it over. This isn't his specialty.]

Maybe...maybe an endurance challenge? Maybe eat as many as I can a day for as many days as I can?

[shortnsweet]

[ Sakon's difficult to sway once he's got his mind set on a challenge, so Nagisa relents just a bit. ]

Hmm... yeah that might be better. I know you probably can't die again, but I really don't want you to hurt yourself, either.

[ittenbari]

Yeah, you're probably right. Though some guy said I could die, but he didn't really explain. Or he hasn't explained yet. I don't really know how that could work, though. Unless it's kind of a "you're dead, but temporarily doing this thing, but you can die again and then you're dead for good" kind of thing, which would really suck because then who'd be your shinki? That would suck!

[He's not scared of dying, though, honestly. Ever since he brought the topic up himself, he's been pretty at peace with the whole thing. He wouldn't go put himself in harm's way needlessly because Nagisa needs him around, but he's not scared of everything ending. Something tells him people would find that weird if he said it out loud, though, so he doesn't.]