thefarshore | BBS 1 - sometimes a bonus just means more work

BBS 1 - sometimes a bonus just means more work

[There's a video on the heavenly BBS. Gintoki, or maybe the god Inari, seems like he's at home. He's in pajamas and a hanten, surrounded by a futon and some suspiciously fluffy and nice-looking blankets, and his expression is . . . hard to read. Why is this video even being made. Who is he trying to talk to.

Maybe he was a little tired of being alone. After all, he was used to having other people around, whether it was the kids who doubled as his employees, or his landlady. He didn't even know where any of those people were now, and he'd been worrying.

Maybe it was time to ask someone.

. . . or maybe. . . ]

Oi. I'm thinking, well, that something was wrong about this. I mean, I'm suddenly this god? And like, Inari is kind of a big name, right? Is that why I have a big empty house?

But you know, it's not like I signed up for any of this, but I really didn't sign up for . . .

. . . for these!

[He'll move what seems like a phone so that whoever is watching can see the top of his head.

And the pair of fluffy ears sitting there. He'll grab on to one, looking pretty stressed out.]

They just. . . they just showed up! Like a drop-in character! Is this to give me more appeal? I'm a main character already! This is gonna change my whole image! Do I have to be clever now? Playful? Tricky? I'm not the cute-type, I'm the handsome-type, right? Oi! I'm good-looking enough.

[He'll tug on an ear especially hard, and then give a wince. Wow. Here's some sulking. For the rest of the video.]

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[He's right that none of them consciously signed up for this, but right now, Elsa is concerned with other thoughts. The nature of shinki, the relationship between gods and humankind, her friends and loved ones back home--

This video is just the distractioon she needs.]

Those are very interesting. [She says that with the air of a scientist examining test results or a new specimen. In fact, she looks as if that's what she's doing, eyes narrowed as she leans closer to the camera than she probably should, all to get a better look.

She'll think about cuteness and handsomness as measurements later. Right now, she has questions.]

When did they appear? Did you experience any discomfort before they -- emerged? Is that what happened? Are you the only person this has happened to?

[Forgive her, she's curious.]

Did you want story-time, lady? I woke up and they were already there.

[He'll dig at one of his actual ears with a pinky, then reach up and give the fox ear a flick. It'll twitch, and he'll shift his gaze upwards.]

[She looks appropriately apologetic in response.] Sorry, that was insensitive of me. I just-- had sort of a scientific interest in this.

More important is that they aren't doing you any harm. [A slight pause.] They're not, are they?

Scientific? You wanna come look at them? They're not doing anything to me, I guess.

Who are you, anyway?

Well-- if they're not bothering you, then it'd be a little invasive.

[But she'd be lying if she said she doesn't want to take him up on that. She's already intrigued by the very existence of the Far Shore. Still, just because she's a god now doesn't mean she can just do what she wants.

She doesn't pursue it, though, just takes the change of topic in stride.]

I'm Elsa. The god Menrva.

[That still feels weird to say. How long will it take to get used to saying it?] It's nice to meet you. [She's sorry your first impression of her is so, uh, scientific.]

[Another god, then. He'll have to keep track of who is who. ]

Nice to meet you, sure. [He'll keep it casual, for now.]

I guess if they do something I'll tell you.

[One of the ears seems to give a few twitches, and he'll reach up and give it a scratch. Oh. That's not bad.]

[She brightens a bit now -- good to know she hasn't completely ruined their potential ... professional relationship? Elsa's not sure what to call this, but she'll take it.]

Thank you, I appreciate that. I hope they... continue not to bother you.

[Yes that's good. Not good at all. She tried. At least she's exuding politeness, she hopes.]

Why not cut them off if they bother you that much?

for the same reason you dont cut off your **lls if they itch a little idiot11!1 go ahead and cut your own off though

[forgive him, he's stressed out]

sorry, only the females of my kind have genitals so I wouldn't know

[hold up. hold up, what?]

what a scary place you must come from

you should see the girls there makes you feel that you're not mising out at all

i guess

i guess id still want to see them anyway

Edited 2016-04-28 15:58 (UTC)

it's your loss is it really that important for you?

im not sure about the appeal, but youve gotta wonder why the fox motif goes to those with silver hair. they werent inari, but i knew two of them with it.

anyway, hope you like fried tofu. youll probably get a bunch of those for offerings.

well i like fried tofu but thats not the point!1 i dont wanna look like im from a fantasy otome game!2 its the wrong genre

dunno about genres and ladies' tastes, but maybe when you get better at being a god, you can hide them?

like, fox spirits are really good at disguise. they forget the ears or the tail until theyre masters at it i think. become a super fox maybe?

is that gonna be my goal now

id rather become hokage

also i don't think im a fox spirit

hokage? youd rather be a fires shadow? they don't have shadows though!

inari is in charge of a bunch of stuff so i guess youre right, maybe its to attract girls and kids for more followers.

that

that seems pretty shady if you say it that way

what are you accusing me of

what the hell is wrong with you

nothing! im not accusing you of anything okay?

letsee...
merchants
blacksmiths
agriculture
rice

thats the stuff inari is associated with, and theyre pretty legitimate.

[Here's one viewer who seems pretty indifferent to actually solving the problem of the ears, and is, instead, far more interested on commenting on their appearance. What more would you expect out of such a young looking kid, though?]

Uwahhh, those are really cute! And they match your hair! Are they soft? They look like they'd be really soft.

[He's ready to be really sulky until he sees that it's just a little girl on the other end of that video. Maybe he'll just be a little sulky, then.]

Oi oi, of course a girl like you would think they're cute. A girl like you'd probably put ears on anything.

[He'll reach up and touch them a bit more. They were soft, and his hair was also soft. It was all just unbearably fluffy.]

. . . I guess, I mean, they're a little soft, but, seriously, this is a burden for me, you know?

[keep complimenting him cute girl]

[Oh, he really doesn't sound as thrilled about them as she is? ~~He didn't earlier, either! Jeez.~~]

Would I...? [Well, he might not be wrong if given the option, but Alluka's not sure if the option would ever present itself. It's something she might have to keep in mind. Just... in case, I guess? It certainly would up the cuteness of a lot of things.

How would they be a burden, though? Something to think about, hm...!]

Do you hear things twice as well with them?

[He'll let go of the ear he was playing with and pause for a moment. Like he's waiting. Like he's really, really concentrating and maybe waiting for something to happen. . . oh. It's not like he was trying to activate ear power or something dumb like that. He'll cough, and he ears will twitch a bit.]

O-of course I don't hear things twice as well. Or have like, you know, echolocation, or any other cool powers. That's a dumb thing to say.

[seriously these ears were useless. He'll put his face in his palm with a grumble.]

[Alluka waits very patiently as Gintoki does... whatever it is he's doing. Waiting? Trying to make the ears do something, maybe? Ah, but nothing particularly impressive happens. She doesn't look displeased, but maybe a little surprised at the lack of, well, anything.]

If you're a god... 'Inari'? Doesn't that mean you have some powers?

[The way the name is said makes it very telling that Alluka doesn't actually know who that is, or what sort of weight the name should reasonably have to it. But gods have powers, right? Even if they don't always have cute ears to go with it.]

[After rubbing at his face some, he'll look back up.]

I guess . . . I mean, I do, right? There's no way I wouldn't have some really amazing god power. I'm sure I have a power that's gonna blow everybody away!

[He looks really smug for no reason. ]

. . . eh, what kinds of powers do the gods have . . .

[So deep in thought. You've given him so much to think about Alluka.]

[Very deep and thought provoking questions like 'what kind of cool powers do gods have'.]

Mine, his name is Gon! He's really, really strong! [Then, as if to emphasize this point, Alluka crooks her arms up into view of the camera, flexing (though it's probably hard to tell under those baggy sleeves). 'Like this!'] He doesn't look like he would be, so I think that's a power of his.

[Here, have an audio reply that is literally just Killua laughing his fool head off, to the point of sobbing laughter. It's almost like it's possible to see this little boy clutching at his stomach as he rolls around in glee, that is how hard he's laughing at you.]

Shut up whoever you are! I hope you get eaten by a phantom right this very second! OH! OI! LOOK BEHIND YOU!

[The laughing actually starts to subside, but it's obvious there are still giggles in Killua's voice.]

No way, no way! A phantom couldn't get a jump on me, I'm too quick. And I don't look as dumb and easy to target as you.

[Killua why.]

If you don't look dumb then why aren't you using video, hah? I bet you look super dumb. Your voice sounds like the dumb-type.

[super mature]

[Hey, well, two can play the "super mature" game, you know.]

Ehhhh? Hah! You're just showing how dumb you really are if you're getting that from my voice.

You sound old. You look pretty old too. Sucks to be you.

[He'll drawl back lazily, hardly missing a beat. Somehow he's pretty skilled at this elementary school level banter.]

Only a kid would say that a cool guy like me looks old. You're definitely some inexperienced kid. Don't let the phantoms find you before you put your diapers on, poor baby.

[He'll casually pick at his nose, flicking whatever is on his finger in the general direction of the video.]

Edited 2016-04-28 16:13 (UTC)

[Killua lets out a laugh.]

Haaaaaah? You really thing being a kid makes me inexperienced? I'm definitely way more skilled than you are, so maybe you should watch your back before you put your adult diapers on~~

[Well that's interesting. Normally Shepard would just pass this by but she's got something of a similar affliction.]

It could be worse. They could have gone all the way.

What's that supposed to mean? You know, you might think you sound cool and mysterious, but that's a pretty weird thing to say. Like you're just some weirdo out there.

What happened to you? Or are you really just some weirdo? Did I call it?

[It's probably more annoying that his voice sounds completely flat and unemotional as he says all of this. Stating it all like it's a fact.]

[Annoying perhaps but it doesn't get under the skin. She's dealt in politics after all and the galactic council has perfected the art of fuck off in amicable tones.]

A little of column A a little of column B. It's Mórrígan. Resident raven of the far shore. [Crow actually but where's the alliteration in that.]

[Oh, they're doing introductions. Ok.]

Inari, I guess. [but then]

Wait, you're a raven? What a useless weapon for a god. What good does that do?

[not even considering she's a god herself, right now]

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BBS 1 - sometimes a bonus just means more work

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video. . .back

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the slowest reply

its cool!

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video ugh cute

video just as planned.

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slow ugh

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