Heaven's BBS | Text

[subconmodo]

From: Mephistopheles
Date: February 8th

You know, even near the end of winter, that time around Valentine's Day always seems like the best time to stuff your face with ice cream. Especially if you're single or want to stay single for the rest of eternity!

So, for all you readers out there with a taste for something cool and refreshing, I've got a great tip for you:

If your ice cream a little too frozen to get a nice, big scoop, just stick your spoon in the microwave! You don't need to heat it up in there for long. About 30 seconds should do.

Let me know how it goes, won't you?

Comments

anon

[monkeyblue]

You can also send your repair bills to his temple when you destroy your microwave by putting metal in it.

[subconmodo]

Who said anything about repair bills? If a bunch of gods can't make a microwave that can deal with a little bit of metal, that sounds like their problem.

perma-anon

[monkeyblue]

You did when you put your name on a post designed to troll the heavens.

[subconmodo]

Look. In my defense, anyone who knows anything about a microwave and does it anyway deserves to have it broken for being so gullible.

[monkeyblue]

[...okay, fair point but.]

And the people who don't?

[subconmodo]

Should read the safety information before they do something stupid and void their warranty.

[monkeyblue]

So when the six year old goddess destroys her microwave because she's a kid....?

[subconmodo]

[It takes him a moment longer than usual to respond to that]

You're kidding me. Who the heck makes a six year old kid a god?! That's just irresponsible!

[monkeyblue]

Talk to the heavens about that one.

[subconmodo]

You know, maybe I should. If someone's breaking some sort of age limit I have no problems taking them to court.

text: Roxas

[missingache]

But the microwave heats things up... wouldn't that melt the ice cream?

[subconmodo]

That's why we're just heating up the spoon. Melt around the spoon, leave the rest of the ice cream intact

[missingache]

It's easier to use hot water. The handle wouldn't get hot that way.

[subconmodo]

Sure, if you want to rack up your water bill.

[missingache]

Tea kettle. While making tea water, you can use the hot water from that.

Voice

[subconmodo]

STOP POKING HOLES IN MY PRANK!

Why the heck does everyone have to be so logical about this? This isn't fair.

[missingache]

[...............]

It's a prank?

[subconmodo]

[SIGH] Yes, it's a prank. Does anyone actually read the safety information on what they use? You're not supposed to put metal in a microwave!

[missingache]

Why can't you put metal in a microwave?

[subconmodo]

Oh, you know, nothing too terrible. Just a few arcs of electricity between whatever metal you shove in and the walls of the microwave.

It actually looks pretty cool!

[missingache]

That... doesn't sound safe.

[subconmodo]

The coolest things in life usually aren't.

[missingache]

Really? Then why are they considered cool if you can get hurt?

[subconmodo]

That's what makes them cool, kid! [at least he thinks this is a kid. Sounds young enough.]

It's just one of those things you have to feel. And see. A one of a kind experience!

anon

[heptagram]

Instructions unclear, how am I supposed to scoop ice cream with shrapnel

[subconmodo]

Very carefully.

But it'll be warm enough to cut right through!