Chikusa (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
kokuyoyo) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
thefarshore2018-07-03 09:57 am
kokuyoyo) wrote in thefarshore2018-07-03 09:57 am
video - BBS
Posted by: Chikusa Kakimoto
Date: December 17
------------------------------
[The video opens up to Chikusa, clearly walking along a street with street lamps and the warm glow of various storefronts going past him. He keeps the camera focused on his face, delivering his words in the usual blank monotone.]
So... A lot of stuff has happened recently. It's been troublesome... So, to help bring peace and whatever back to the household... Hakkai is taking us all to an all you can eat buffet sort of place.
[He carefully turns his camera around, focusing on what's ahead of him. Or, rather, the people walking ahead of him: Cho Hakkai leading at the very front, the scruffy headed Sha Gojyo close besides them as the two talk about whatever, Goku nearly right behind, and Ken behind him. Ken in particular seems to be switching from looking back at Chikusa as if to make sure that he hasn't lost him and exchanging indistinct bickerings with Goku. After making sure he's gotten a decent enough shot, Chikusa turns the camera back around to focus on his face.]
...I once saw Goku and Ken go through an entire pot of pasta. Each. And were still hungry.
[With that, the video is cut, skipping ahead to Chikusa getting a nice pan up to the restaurant sign even as the group goes inside the restaurant. It's a noisy affair, considering both the Li Tieguai group itself is full of chatty fuckers (save for Chikusa apparently) and also because this is a public restaurant and other actual people do dine here. While they're in the lobby to be seated (or, rather, while Hakkai patiently gets the host's attention so that they can be seated), Chikusa slowly pans over to where the dining area can be seen.... and, there in the distance underneath bright lights, the buffet itself.]
[He pans it back to his own face. Chikusa's emotive abilities are usually lowkey, and tonight is no exception. There's the faintest twist at one corner of his mouth, a barely noticeable quirk of his eyebrows... and nothing more than that before he eventually pans it back to the group as a whole being guided at last by a clearly embarrassed hostess. Goku and Ken are clearly and barely being held back from charging the buffet, at least before they know where they're being seated at...]
[Chikusa, clearly, doesn't care about this rule that Hakkai's probably put down, because the camera suddenly is jerked downwards and everything becomes a blur. Anyone who's quick enough, or pauses the video enough, might be able to make out a small partition, an entire table... and the sound of enraged teenage yelling.]
[When the video finally slows again, becoming steady, Chikusa raises it up once more. He's now in an entirely different part of the restaurant... and a borderline wall has been erected, at which Goku and Ken are pressed again, possibly with slightly red faces from a head on collision with a top notch borderline. Ken seems to be yelling something about a 'stupid kappa' if anyone listens carefully. Chikusa keeps the camera focused on them for a little bit, possibly out of his own sadistic amusement, before panning slowly over the beautiful stretch of buffet food which waits him, and then up to his own face...]
...I want to actually eat something tonight.
[Aaaaaaaaaaaaaand yet another cut.]
[When the camera starts up again, it's clearly been places besides someone's plate, and clearly a decent amount of time has passed considering that it's a very full plate. Presumably it's Chikusa's and, sitting across from him is Hakkai with Gojyo beside him. The no-longer-a-redhead (now dyed black in fact) seems to be talking to Hakkai about something or another- his full mouth makes it hard to tell- but that's not really the important part. What's important is that, as Gojyo is preoccupied with Hakkai, a hand sneaks around from out of frame to carefully pluck spring rolls off of Gojyo's plate, all in the same hand...]
[When he's caught, Goku practically vaults over the back of the seat, Gojyo right behind him, and the camera is almost dutifully picked up again to follow them running around the buffet and... Is that... music fading into existence...?]
[Did Chikusa really edit the Benny Hill theme in? Yes. He did.]
[After perhaps a minute or so, however, the camera moves again, focusing on Gojyo's plate... and Ken leaning across the table with a wide wolfish grin, snatching what's left on there to be put onto his own plate. Fully aware of how he's being filmed, too, apparently, considering how he grins right at the camera with a loud snicker... And, oh, there's presumably Chikusa's hand, reaching out to also take what's left.]
[Hakkai just continues to calmly drink his iced tea. At some point, mildly, the question "Are you going to film everything?" is asked.]
[The answer is apparently 'yes', because there's another cut. This time, however, it appears that Chikusa isn't the one manning the camera. No, the shot opens up on him back at the buffet, apparently taking advantage of a lull inbetween Goku and Ken destroying it, and pans back to the table... where at least three tiny paper balls, torn up from the straw packets, have landed in a water glass positioned at Chikusa's spot, and all three jackasses of House Li Tieguai (that is to say, Ken, Gojyo, and Goku) are all snickering and grinning as they take turns trying to land a shot in Chikusa's glass. It continues for a minute before Ken seems to perk up and immediately abandons the game to go back to stuffing his face, and the other two follow suit. The reason for this is obvious, as Chikusa arrives only a moment after. The camera keeps steady, only taking in most of his torso with his head out of frame... but then, it's pretty obvious that he can only be doing one thing, and that is staring dead eyed at the mess of little paper balls in his water.]
[Goku speaks up first.] Gojyo, why'd ya toss all that paper into Chikusa's cup?
Wh-
Yeah, jeez, Gojyo, how could you? [This would be more convincing (maybe) if Ken weren't wearing the biggest possible shit-eating grin he's physically capable of. And he has a big mouth. It's pretty big.]
Screw you both, traitors! I see how it is. Hakkai, run back that video-!
[As the bickering between the jackass trio goes on, Chikusa takes his seat again in the middle of it, and the camera nudges a little to focus on him... and the way he just casually steals Ken's drink away from him. The blond bolts up indignantly, immediately shoving himself against him as he yells and tries to flail his arms to grab the cup back. A shame Chikusa's limbs are so damn long, enabling him to keep his partner at bay as he takes a sip. From the side, Gojyo's snickering can be heard as the argument briefly breaks off.]
Fine with drinking dog spit, huh?
[Chikusa carefully puts the glass down while keeping Ken at bay.] ...Well, I'm used to it... [And with that, he lowers his guard so that he can lean close to Ken and just... Okay, so they're just making out now, apparently. Ken pauses, surprised, before leaning right into it with glee.]
Hakkaaaiiii, Chikusa is being a pervert again-!
[A sigh can be heard from the operator of the camera that's already being put down. The angle is just enough to see Gojyo reaching over to dump beer over Goku's head while he's distracted by the honeymoon couple, and there's an outraged shout. A food fight quickly develops between the two, Chikusa calmly drawing a line between him and the shitshow occurring. Helpful, considering Goku tries to toss some food his way, too, to make them stop making out. It doesn't take very long before the video is cut again.]
[The next shot is clearly back in Chikusa's hands, considering the view... and it's a view of Gojyo leaning over Hakkai's currently empty spot, grinning like a yakuza thug as he... squeezes all the lemon slices from everyone else's glasses into Hakkai's water? Goku is leaning forward like he's watching a dangerous magic trick, next to Ken who's perked up with severe interest. That's a good five lemon slices all emptied into a single glass of water, and Gojyo leans back into his seat, satisfied. There's an air of anticipation as the table goes back to trying to eat, but all their eyes are on Hakkai's spot, especially when the man comes back with his plate. Neatly, he takes a sip of his water...]
[...And just. Doesn't react. At all. He takes a sip, goes back to eating, continues to sip...]
[Gojyo isn't grinning now. Instead, him, Goku, and Ken are all staring in quiet nervousness.]
[Which they should be, because the next time the video cuts, it's to an otherwise empty table, and it's focused on Hakkai carefully filling spring rolls with something that looks red hot enough (in spice and color) to burn through a man's tongue, and he carefully spreads it out on Gojyo's plate. When he's done, he smiles directly over to the camera.]
[It's kind of terrifying. When everyone returns to the table, almost all of them immediately dig into the spring rolls. (Gojyo's plate has clearly already been established as a free for all, after all.) It only takes a couple of bites (or, in one case, shoving the thing in whole, thanks Ken) for Gojyo and Ken to abruptly pause. Gojyo himself braces himself against the table, face heating up and one hand over his mouth. Across from him, Ken is sinking in his seat and halfway under the table with a long, pained whine.]
[Neither Goku or Chikusa stop, and the former in fact just kind of blinks blankly at the other two as he keeps stuffing his face with springs rolls.]
[...The next cut is of Goku standing up, head tilted back and downing an entire pitcher of water. The camera stays focused on his red-faced plight for a moment, before slowly panning back to the spring rolls. Still manning the camera and apparently unaffected, Chikusa reaches out to grab another roll.]
[The cut after that is labeled helpfully with large white letters that says "TIME SKIP". It's apparently a fast-forwarded recording, focused purely on the buffet itself... and keeping track of its state as the group demolishes it. Mainly Goku and Ken, frankly, where there are more than a few occurrences of one of them tackling the other, but Gojyo has his own appetite as well, and apparently neither animal boy is ashamed of dragging him down into their wrestling match for pork buns.]
[And the very last shot... A slow pan over of an utterly food-demolished buffet, stunned staffed only able to stare in faint horror and confusion... and Hakkai, leaving what is apparently a very sizable tip on their disaster zone of a table.]
[It's a sizable video... and posted up on Youtube, apparently. Hit that like button...?]
Date: December 17
------------------------------
[The video opens up to Chikusa, clearly walking along a street with street lamps and the warm glow of various storefronts going past him. He keeps the camera focused on his face, delivering his words in the usual blank monotone.]
So... A lot of stuff has happened recently. It's been troublesome... So, to help bring peace and whatever back to the household... Hakkai is taking us all to an all you can eat buffet sort of place.
[He carefully turns his camera around, focusing on what's ahead of him. Or, rather, the people walking ahead of him: Cho Hakkai leading at the very front, the scruffy headed Sha Gojyo close besides them as the two talk about whatever, Goku nearly right behind, and Ken behind him. Ken in particular seems to be switching from looking back at Chikusa as if to make sure that he hasn't lost him and exchanging indistinct bickerings with Goku. After making sure he's gotten a decent enough shot, Chikusa turns the camera back around to focus on his face.]
...I once saw Goku and Ken go through an entire pot of pasta. Each. And were still hungry.
[With that, the video is cut, skipping ahead to Chikusa getting a nice pan up to the restaurant sign even as the group goes inside the restaurant. It's a noisy affair, considering both the Li Tieguai group itself is full of chatty fuckers (save for Chikusa apparently) and also because this is a public restaurant and other actual people do dine here. While they're in the lobby to be seated (or, rather, while Hakkai patiently gets the host's attention so that they can be seated), Chikusa slowly pans over to where the dining area can be seen.... and, there in the distance underneath bright lights, the buffet itself.]
[He pans it back to his own face. Chikusa's emotive abilities are usually lowkey, and tonight is no exception. There's the faintest twist at one corner of his mouth, a barely noticeable quirk of his eyebrows... and nothing more than that before he eventually pans it back to the group as a whole being guided at last by a clearly embarrassed hostess. Goku and Ken are clearly and barely being held back from charging the buffet, at least before they know where they're being seated at...]
[Chikusa, clearly, doesn't care about this rule that Hakkai's probably put down, because the camera suddenly is jerked downwards and everything becomes a blur. Anyone who's quick enough, or pauses the video enough, might be able to make out a small partition, an entire table... and the sound of enraged teenage yelling.]
[When the video finally slows again, becoming steady, Chikusa raises it up once more. He's now in an entirely different part of the restaurant... and a borderline wall has been erected, at which Goku and Ken are pressed again, possibly with slightly red faces from a head on collision with a top notch borderline. Ken seems to be yelling something about a 'stupid kappa' if anyone listens carefully. Chikusa keeps the camera focused on them for a little bit, possibly out of his own sadistic amusement, before panning slowly over the beautiful stretch of buffet food which waits him, and then up to his own face...]
...I want to actually eat something tonight.
[Aaaaaaaaaaaaaand yet another cut.]
[When the camera starts up again, it's clearly been places besides someone's plate, and clearly a decent amount of time has passed considering that it's a very full plate. Presumably it's Chikusa's and, sitting across from him is Hakkai with Gojyo beside him. The no-longer-a-redhead (now dyed black in fact) seems to be talking to Hakkai about something or another- his full mouth makes it hard to tell- but that's not really the important part. What's important is that, as Gojyo is preoccupied with Hakkai, a hand sneaks around from out of frame to carefully pluck spring rolls off of Gojyo's plate, all in the same hand...]
[When he's caught, Goku practically vaults over the back of the seat, Gojyo right behind him, and the camera is almost dutifully picked up again to follow them running around the buffet and... Is that... music fading into existence...?]
[Did Chikusa really edit the Benny Hill theme in? Yes. He did.]
[After perhaps a minute or so, however, the camera moves again, focusing on Gojyo's plate... and Ken leaning across the table with a wide wolfish grin, snatching what's left on there to be put onto his own plate. Fully aware of how he's being filmed, too, apparently, considering how he grins right at the camera with a loud snicker... And, oh, there's presumably Chikusa's hand, reaching out to also take what's left.]
[Hakkai just continues to calmly drink his iced tea. At some point, mildly, the question "Are you going to film everything?" is asked.]
[The answer is apparently 'yes', because there's another cut. This time, however, it appears that Chikusa isn't the one manning the camera. No, the shot opens up on him back at the buffet, apparently taking advantage of a lull inbetween Goku and Ken destroying it, and pans back to the table... where at least three tiny paper balls, torn up from the straw packets, have landed in a water glass positioned at Chikusa's spot, and all three jackasses of House Li Tieguai (that is to say, Ken, Gojyo, and Goku) are all snickering and grinning as they take turns trying to land a shot in Chikusa's glass. It continues for a minute before Ken seems to perk up and immediately abandons the game to go back to stuffing his face, and the other two follow suit. The reason for this is obvious, as Chikusa arrives only a moment after. The camera keeps steady, only taking in most of his torso with his head out of frame... but then, it's pretty obvious that he can only be doing one thing, and that is staring dead eyed at the mess of little paper balls in his water.]
[Goku speaks up first.] Gojyo, why'd ya toss all that paper into Chikusa's cup?
Wh-
Yeah, jeez, Gojyo, how could you? [This would be more convincing (maybe) if Ken weren't wearing the biggest possible shit-eating grin he's physically capable of. And he has a big mouth. It's pretty big.]
Screw you both, traitors! I see how it is. Hakkai, run back that video-!
[As the bickering between the jackass trio goes on, Chikusa takes his seat again in the middle of it, and the camera nudges a little to focus on him... and the way he just casually steals Ken's drink away from him. The blond bolts up indignantly, immediately shoving himself against him as he yells and tries to flail his arms to grab the cup back. A shame Chikusa's limbs are so damn long, enabling him to keep his partner at bay as he takes a sip. From the side, Gojyo's snickering can be heard as the argument briefly breaks off.]
Fine with drinking dog spit, huh?
[Chikusa carefully puts the glass down while keeping Ken at bay.] ...Well, I'm used to it... [And with that, he lowers his guard so that he can lean close to Ken and just... Okay, so they're just making out now, apparently. Ken pauses, surprised, before leaning right into it with glee.]
Hakkaaaiiii, Chikusa is being a pervert again-!
[A sigh can be heard from the operator of the camera that's already being put down. The angle is just enough to see Gojyo reaching over to dump beer over Goku's head while he's distracted by the honeymoon couple, and there's an outraged shout. A food fight quickly develops between the two, Chikusa calmly drawing a line between him and the shitshow occurring. Helpful, considering Goku tries to toss some food his way, too, to make them stop making out. It doesn't take very long before the video is cut again.]
[The next shot is clearly back in Chikusa's hands, considering the view... and it's a view of Gojyo leaning over Hakkai's currently empty spot, grinning like a yakuza thug as he... squeezes all the lemon slices from everyone else's glasses into Hakkai's water? Goku is leaning forward like he's watching a dangerous magic trick, next to Ken who's perked up with severe interest. That's a good five lemon slices all emptied into a single glass of water, and Gojyo leans back into his seat, satisfied. There's an air of anticipation as the table goes back to trying to eat, but all their eyes are on Hakkai's spot, especially when the man comes back with his plate. Neatly, he takes a sip of his water...]
[...And just. Doesn't react. At all. He takes a sip, goes back to eating, continues to sip...]
[Gojyo isn't grinning now. Instead, him, Goku, and Ken are all staring in quiet nervousness.]
[Which they should be, because the next time the video cuts, it's to an otherwise empty table, and it's focused on Hakkai carefully filling spring rolls with something that looks red hot enough (in spice and color) to burn through a man's tongue, and he carefully spreads it out on Gojyo's plate. When he's done, he smiles directly over to the camera.]
[It's kind of terrifying. When everyone returns to the table, almost all of them immediately dig into the spring rolls. (Gojyo's plate has clearly already been established as a free for all, after all.) It only takes a couple of bites (or, in one case, shoving the thing in whole, thanks Ken) for Gojyo and Ken to abruptly pause. Gojyo himself braces himself against the table, face heating up and one hand over his mouth. Across from him, Ken is sinking in his seat and halfway under the table with a long, pained whine.]
[Neither Goku or Chikusa stop, and the former in fact just kind of blinks blankly at the other two as he keeps stuffing his face with springs rolls.]
[...The next cut is of Goku standing up, head tilted back and downing an entire pitcher of water. The camera stays focused on his red-faced plight for a moment, before slowly panning back to the spring rolls. Still manning the camera and apparently unaffected, Chikusa reaches out to grab another roll.]
[The cut after that is labeled helpfully with large white letters that says "TIME SKIP". It's apparently a fast-forwarded recording, focused purely on the buffet itself... and keeping track of its state as the group demolishes it. Mainly Goku and Ken, frankly, where there are more than a few occurrences of one of them tackling the other, but Gojyo has his own appetite as well, and apparently neither animal boy is ashamed of dragging him down into their wrestling match for pork buns.]
[And the very last shot... A slow pan over of an utterly food-demolished buffet, stunned staffed only able to stare in faint horror and confusion... and Hakkai, leaving what is apparently a very sizable tip on their disaster zone of a table.]
[It's a sizable video... and posted up on Youtube, apparently. Hit that like button...?]