But, hmm... [She hesitates, looking uncertain of how to explain.]

But... Good or bad, no one's doing anything to me here and I don't know how to feel. Hitting me, or burning me or anything like that... It's fine, I'm not afraid of violence or pain. But doing nothing at all--It's like they don't care about me at all, one way or another.

So I'm okay with people being mean to me, because... It means they care even if it's only to use me. So it's really fine. As long as people don't forget about me, as long as people acknowledge I exist... It's fine.

[So she says, but...]